I nearly missed the train to Köln. Had to run to catch it by the skin of my teeth
May 27, 2016 § Leave a comment
I nearly missed the train to Köln. Had to run to catch it by the skin of my teeth. So on our way to Berlin. With no enthusiasm. But I can’t just keep watching —– at the ——– as my only enjoyment. Polish my books into finished jewels. You don’t realise how extraordinary your life is. I lead an extraordinary life. And have (had?) an extraordinary partner. I have not seen one single attractive woman on this trip. How excited these cross-European train journeys used to make me. Not anymore. I left home just 24 hours ago. It feels longer. Are those highs gone forever? Perhaps I am cured of the old addiction after all but just need to realise it. Then what is left? Writing my four books about the years of that addiction. Enjoying —–. There is an awful lot to enjoy in —–. Helping her study for another career. Travelling with her. I love German architecture. Elegant but strong. Cultured but powerful. We have left the Dusseldorf chimes behind. I think after this she will never love me like she did; maybe not love me at all anymore. Perhaps she has already replaced me in her heart with someone new (or old). Will I keep my seat all the way? Or will its rightful owner claim it at Dortmund?