And yet I need both those sides of my character (or at least I have always up to now convinced myself that I do). I could not live always as a good man, and I would not want to live always as a bad man. I need them both. The oscillating from one to the other is what gives movement to my mechanism and generates the spark that gives me the vital electricity I need to function. It keeps my pendulum swinging. I always need to feel this massive swinging pendulum. Oh there are so many concerts coming up that I would love to see. Alice Sara Ott at the Wigmore Hall on Saturday, Julia Fischer on 5th October, Rosalind Ventris on the 6th October, Alexandra Soumm on the 16th October. We should go to a classical music concert together, Mrs —-’s son texted me a couple of months ago, touchingly. “I like violinists with big tits” I responded, truthfully. Should I be ashamed of that? A nubile violinist on a stage excites me almost as much as a nubile dancer. I get in trouble for saying this, but I am sorry it is true. Men like looking at sexy women, and if they are playing a violin or a piano it is even sexier. I am a scopophiliac. There is nothing wrong with that. Actually I notice on Thursday 20th September the Wigmore Hall has a day long exploration of Music & Dementia, maybe I should book a front row seat for that; or two.