Sarah saw it as can I have relationships or can I not have relationships. I saw it as can I cope with my blackness or can I not cope with my blackness. She lives in a world of relationships, so that’s what she measures everything by; I live in a world of blackness so that’s what I measure everything by. The difference between creatures that live in volcanoes at the bottom of the sea and creatures that live on the side of mountains on the surface. They couldn’t live in each other’s systems.